On Thursday, my buddy Sourk and I decided to trade emails while seeing exactly how much hoops we could watch while pretending to work. We had so much fun, we did it again Friday. Started out slow, as we actually had work to do, but picked it up as the ‘Madness’ really unleashed itself on the tournament. 2012-2013 CU Hoops, RIP (damnit all).
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Sourk (12:16pm EST)
I’m not even sure where to begin. Great upset by Harvard last night, but does anyone REALLY care? I mean, who knew anything about New Mexico besides they must be pretty good because of their seed? For some reason, upsets aren’t the same unless it’s a Duke, UNC, Kansas, Syracuse, etc. losing.
I still remember Kansas losing to Bucknell in ’03(?) and UConn (the team supposed to end George Mason’s run) getting beat in the Elite 8. The upset last night will be forgotten by the end of the tournament.
For some reason, I think today is going to go one of two ways: pretty much straight chalk, or rip up your bracket, stop caring and enjoy chaos. There’s something to be said about the chaos option. Obviously winning the bracket and cash is great, but I’m starting to get the same feeling I do with fantasy football where I tell myself “this is the last year, I’m not sure I enjoy the actual game(s) as much as i used to.” Obviously I would have very little interest in watching half of these games if my pick wasn’t on the line, but it’s fun to watch a game and not care who wins. Watch it just to watch it.
Favorite games of the day for me: Cinci v. Creighton and Wisconsin v. Ole Miss…now you talk about CU (homer)
Me (1:28pm EST)
Before I jump in, lets hop back to yesterday right quick, and my bashing of the Colo State Rams, with whom I have a long standing blood feud. If I was a McCoy, the entire city of Ft Collins would be a Hatfield. I didn’t choose this life, it chose me. That said, respect. They took out the habitually underachieving Mizzou Tigers, and did so with almost a total white wash. Even further, as my buddy points out “they have a white guy named Iverson, a black guy named Octeus. Octeus Prime… and an ex-alcoholic head coach that goes to frat parties and smooches coeds.” Good point.To New Mexico and your point about upsets- agreed. Nobody cares, unless you had them going deep, like my buddy who I won’t name, David Cline. But last year when two of the two seeds lost on the first day? Chaos. But come on…nothing short of serious brain trauma will ever stop me from playing fantasy and picking brackets. It’s just too much fun, even if it always ends in heartbreak.Before I get all randy for the Buffs, let’s talk about Marshall Mathers Henderson, aka the Real Slim Shady, aka the greatest player in college hoops this year. Have you seen this maniac?
Watch him incite a riot with these Auburn dangbros (Deadspin captures it the best- take a good hard look at those rednecks):
Or lose his shit on Vanderbilt:
Or slay Florida in the SEC Championship, and hit ’em with the Gator Chomp:
Super sized cajones… After they beat Georgia in OT, he dropped the greatest post-game press conference ever:
“If it’s all the same, it’s Saturday night. I’m out.”
The Wisconsin Buzzcuts (TM Mark Titus) will probably 20-pt them, but goddamn is he awesome.
On to my Buffs. I’m scared Kyle. There are two CU teams: the team that out scraps everyone, plays D, rebounds their asses off and uses athleticism on the wing to beat Arizona (twice), Oregon and Baylor; the JV team that looks like they rode the short bus to the game against Cal and Utah. I will say, the PAC-12 waved both middle fingers at the seeding committee yesterday, and I think we do the same. I dont know nothin’ bout Illinois, but Illinois is in trouble. Roll tad Kyle, Roll Tad.
Sourk (3:09pm EST)
Alright, first round of games for the day in the books and I’m already thrilled. I had Wisconsin winning, but losing to K-state (with K-state also beating Gonzaga). The way the Zags looked last round is making me feel pretty good about picking up a few points on the field. Could really go for Creighton to win and NC State to play up to their ability instead of down to their competition.
Slim Shady is the man, and I’m starting to think after beating Florida and Wisconsin, two hot, talented teams back-to-back, that they could be the annual 12-seed in the sweet sixteen or even elite 8. He could go from a relative nobody outside of basketball fans to a nationally known player.
Does Doug McDermott have an NBA future? The guy has been filling it up for years and can really stroke it. With all the stretch 4’s I find it hard to imagine that he can’t be a rotation player someplace. Which reminds me, every white power forward should study Nick Collison. First big off the bench on one of the best teams in the league. All you have to do is set good screens, hit open 15 footers, hedge pick-and-rolls and board hard as shit. Basically, try hard. Point being, I want my wizards to draft Otto Porter and Doug McDermott.
Me (4:50pm)
So happy Slim and the Rebels took down Wisconsin. Bo Ryan teams are usually good, occasionally really good, and ALWAYS a complete abomination to the game of basketball. Not only are they ugly in appearance (I see you Carrot Top), but they turn every game they play into a low-40s snooze-fest. On top of that, their best player shoots free-throw jumpers. Glad they’re gone.
Onto McDermott, I like where your head’s at. The way he busts his ass on both ends of the floor, emphasizes fundamentals, and squeezes out every ounce of talent he has really reminds me of Boogie Cousins, only the exact opposite. Seriously though, I see him as a Wally Szczerbiak type. Probably 6-7 years as a solid role player, and you could stretch that out if he falls in the draft to a quality franchise like San Antonio. The best scenario for your Wizards is to tank all of next year, because this draft sucks, and there’s probably 3-4 franchise players next year.
Can we take a quick second to talk about these new Adidas jerseys? If you aren’t sure what I’m on about; Louisville, Notre Dame, Kansas, Cincinnati, Baylor and UCLA are all being punished for not repping a proper brand like Nike by having to wear these disasters. They’re like a cross between board shorts, the widely laughed at Golden State short-sleeve jerseys, and the zebra print parachute pants preferred by Bret the Hitman Hart. They’re effing hideous.
Anyway, luckily I’m home on my couch for the Buffs game, so I can throw/shout things without fear of judement. Roll Tad.
Me (5:57pm)
Sooo, looks like Bad CU showed up. Seriously couldn’t draw up a worst first half. Scott is literally throwing balls at the basket, Illinois has 6 three’s and 15 points off turnovers, and Tad decided to play ‘YMCA- everybody plays!’ We need a miracle.
Sourk (7:11pm EST)
So I just got up to the mountains and missed the entire second half of what I can only imagine was a furious comeback by K State and epic choke job. Down 18 at half (with a cozy spot in my elite 8), I was pretty depressed. Check the score in the car and all tied, thinking we got this. That’s right, “we”. We did not have this.
All in all, my brackets are fairly in tact and if Gonzaga drops one of its next two games, I’m back.
One thing we haven’t talked about, survivor style bracket challenge. You have to pick one team to win each day and can’t reuse them. Not quite as hard as NFL style, but still pretty tough. After narrowly escaping with a Gonzaga win yesterday, I need Gtown to handle business today. Haven’t thought much beyond that, but I recommend trying it if you haven’t already.
Sorry to hear about your Buffs. I can’t decide if I’m happy or sad to see Dinwiddie’s stach leave the tourney so soon. It could’ve been the star of the next few weeks.
Me (8:26pm EST)
Man, that game was a freaking emotional rollercoaster. Down 16 at half, up 5, lose by 8. Sucks because we didn’t play to our talent, but in this Game, you win, or you die. In other news, Georgetown is getting rolled by the always powerful Florida Golf Club (my buddy Teiffel’s joke, not mine), who I’m pretty sure is sponsored by Wal-Mart. This tournament makes so much sense. Enjoy the mountains, I’m switching to bourbon.
Sourk (8:37pm EST)
In good news, my Florida final 4 pick looks better. But not quite as good as the Florida Gulf Coast wife. Dear god, I might root for the upset just to keep her relevant for the rest of the weekend.
Remember when I said today could go one of two ways?? Pretty sure a 2, 4, and 5 going down (prior to the night session) qualifies…
Me (9:16pm EST)
Well, Florida Golf Club just wrapped up the shocker of the tournament so far. Glad you pointed out the wife, as she took over the Katherine Webb memorial ‘smokeshow who steals the thunder of a big sporting event’ award (still working on the name). Googled her, turns out she’s a super model. Seriously. All we were missing was that perv Brent Musberger
The second day isn’t even over yet, and I’m exhausted. My final four is still in tact, but I’ve lost every bet I’ve made, and they haven’t even been close. Time to reel it in and lick my wounds. Also, since I’m writing this, and not giving you a chance to respond, one more time with feeling: ‘LET’S GO DUKE!’
illiterate sports 